Well, 2014, you sure did start off with a bang.
On the fourth day of the new year, I bid a teary farewell to my Mom who wrapped up an epic family holiday extravaganza that began on December 21. For those of you keeping track, that’s 14 consecutive days of relatives. I don’t care how often you meditate or how lovely your family is, that’s a f@cking LOT of togetherness. Merry new year!
On day three of the new year, perhaps in anticipation of the familial departure, my body went into full tilt meltdown: body aches, headache, and a throat so sore that I had to summon the courage to swallow. I was, in a word, pitiful. Assuming I had strep, or you know, a little touch of the plague, I took myself to the doc-in-a-box near my house. This particular doc-in-a-box has a little infusion of Jesus in it. Normally, I’d go for secular medicine, but let’s remember, I was in a pinch and also, pitiful. Not to suddenly get all non secular on you, but I’m of the notion that God is in us and all around us anyway, but on this day, some of his most loyal fans serenaded me as I waited to have my throat, ears and vitals checked. Let me get specific: Christian Rock piped into the exam rooms.
As I waited for the physician and pondered the current state of Christian Rock, I received a visit from a chipper male medical assistant who swabbed my throat to check for strep (Yes, I gagged. I always gag.) and used some new instrument that checks for fluid behind your ears (Yes, fluid. Ew.) Then I waited for 20 minutes.
The physician was a kind-faced, soft spoken woman who offered the proper amount of sympathy and concern. I did not, to her surprise, have strep throat, just some nebulous, nameless infection. To speed my recovery she told me she was going to give me two shots: one antibiotic, one steroid. Oh, shots. Then she wrote me prescriptions for the antibiotic, steroid and Hydrocodone cough syrup. Finally, a break!
The chipper assistant came back in with the two shots and politely requested that I drop just enough trou for my hips to accept inoculation. Done and done.
After a thrilling, 45-minute visit to my local pharmacy during which I purchased juice, Lipton Noodle Soup and more tissues, I came home, and Mom made me soup. I took a couple of healthy slurps of cough syrup and went to bed.
On day six of the new year, I walked out of my house to find my car battery dead.
Really, 2014? It’s gonna be like that?
Truly, everything is fine. I’m feeling good. I have a new car battery, and no family visits are planned for the next four to six months. (Love you guys!)
As we all get to know this little hellcat called 2014, I thought it might be worth mentioning that attempting to find the humor in these little adventures life hands us is one of the best gifts we can give ourselves.
Though we’re only 14 days into 2014, (Guys, see the parallel! I didn’t even plan it!) there is already a lot of inspiring stuff out there.
Here are a few I’m digging thus far:
The Representation Project put together this incredible piece: The Mask You Live In. It’s all about what we as a culture do to boys to make them men. And it’s time for a change.
Meryl Streep presents Emma Thompson with the Best Actress honor at the National Board of Review Awards and talks feminism. These are a few of my favorite things!
NANA is a British comfort food and craft cafe hosted by lovely older ladies from their respective local areas. In a nutshell, NANA brings together ladies over 65 with little to do with the communities that need yummy homemade food. Genius Brits.
That’s it. Tame the hellcat!